One thing that is surprising about the whole New Year’s Resolution process is that it is a little more polarizing than expected. As 2009 starts, I’ve noticed some folks that are great setting up resolutions and then measuring themselves against them every year, while others abhor the process of setting resolutions in general.
I don’t feel particularly passionate one way or another, but the approach I am going to take this year is this: I make them, but I don’t share them. It’s between me and the universe.
I’ve found that it’s important to take stock at set times, kind of like setting a performance review schedule at work. But I’ve also found that these personal resolutions are either, well, too personal to share – or, and more importantly, by sharing them I feel my resolve diminished.
Let me explain. It may be only in the less-disciplined of us, but I feel like talk sometimes discourages action, in that people (myself included) derive some strange satisfaction out of talking about something that makes them less inclined to actually do it. It’s the reason why people have so many meetings and leave them without concrete to-dos. It’s the reason why people engage in small talk over meaningful connection. It’s the reason why, the minute I share that it’s my goal to work out every day, I am oddly less likely to accomplish it. And unless, at age 34, I hire someone to be my full-time mother there is no way someone else is going to truly make sure I accomplish those New Year’s goals!
This past year, I got engaged and married to a wonderful woman. That process had incredible moments in it that I will never forget – life-flashing-before-your-eyes moments – but it took a lot of guts to see it through the right way (and I applaud all my fellows who have done the same). Because I worked at it and kept my eye on the prize, because of my resolve to do it and do it right, I wake up on the first day of 2009 happily married.
So what’s my 2009 resolution that I will share with you? To live with resolve, the same way I did in 2008. To accomplish the things I know I want to do, no matter how the universe conspires against them.
I wish the same for you.